I am frustrated..

They don't seem to understand that sometimes I need my notes to complete my exercises...
... and that I can't complete my exercises if they don't return them to me...

I keep wishing they'll give me my notes back earlier but I don't do anything about it.

That makes things more frustrating.

Aargh.

Why is MR = a - 2bQ not equal to MR = d(TR)/d(Q)? They're supposed to be the same..

Aargh. Again.

Glitch! Glitches everywhere!

Aargh. And again I say aargh.

But I kinda promised to be more positive this year.

So screw the aarghs.

Econs dateline's not till friday! I have 2 days left!

Except Derrick wants to borrow my papers tmr.

I have the whole day at school tmr to do it!

Screw the aarghs!

Just A Thought

If I were to call Shaun, Shaunny...

... Jessica, Jessie...

... Mark, Markie...

... then Adrian Mau would be...

... Mawi!

Just a thought.

Ignore me.

Shaun has a blog!

Hihi.... Hope got more words than sis' wan eh.... hehehhehehehe....

I Started A Conversation

... and kept it going.

YAY!

Today I sent Shaun to MAKSAT for badminton with the rest of the church people. Don't misunderstand eh. It's not like I'm a super good sis or wat. There were many reasons for me to send him to MAKSAT:

1. I like driving. Nah, screw that. I love driving. Nah. I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE driving.
2. I forgot to pass around the Barnabas Aid "Right to Justice" petition form (how could I??? Aarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...) in church, so I thought I'd do it at MAKSAT.
3. I wanted to make an effort to socialize since I'm so horrible at it.

Aaron Jr's uncle and cousins came today. No need so much info on the uncle la hor.

Name: Terrance Joseph
Racial Heritage: Mix of Portugese & Indian blood
Age: 16
School: SMK St. Francis
Interests: Religion(s)

Name: Tania Joseph
Racial Heritage: Mix of Portugese & Indian blood
Age: 13
School: SMK Seri Kota
Interests: Anime & Mexican Drama Series

Phew! Socializing isn't as bad as it used to be!

Sis was right. The tough part is always initiating the conversation. After that, things get better. Phew again. Phew!

It's good to know that I can still do something besides sitting on the bench like a pitiful person.

I think I'll start to go to MAKSAT more often.

Accident!

Yup.

I think I'll go learn about cars so that I'll know how damaged a car is, and which car is damaged less during an accident, so that I can properly evaluate the situation and at least know what to say when (ya, not if) I get into an accident.

Seoks was fetching me to dad's office in Ong Kim Wee after "house practice". We didn't actually have house practice cuz it rained. Yay!!!!

Seoks was following this white car pretty closely la (so close that dad would chew me out if I did it). The driver turned on the left signal and wanted to turn left, but he was really taking his time about it. Seoks braked, but then decided she'd overtake him from the right and zoom away. But as she was going to do it, she realized she couldn't cuz there wasn't enough space. So she braked again. Kinda sudden stop la. I mean, she was at about 10 km/hr but it still wasn't slow enough, I suppose.

CRASH! BOOM! BANG! PIANG!

No la. Not like that, but it felt like that. I thought we hit the front car, but it turned out it was the back one la. The Mercedes behind us had been going at 40 km/hr when Seoks braked the first time. I don't really understand what the fella was saying, but he said that it was her fault because she braked suddenly the second time. Seoks argued back and said that she braked the first time, and the second time she moved, it was dreadfully slow (which I agree with). He argued that he was going very slowly too at 40 km/hr. Seoks said: 40 heng kuai liao leh (which I agree with also. Of course, you do realize that I didn't voice out my agreement there and then..). Then he and his gf - I think - went on talking about how it was Seoks' fault for braking and then moving then braking again. So cuz my Mandarin is so teruk, I only managed to piece every bit of their conversation together after quite some time to learn that they were actually blaming the accident on Seoks' 2nd stop.

Frankly, I found their hujah-hujah pretty silly. If they were going at 40 km/hr, they would've knocked into her anyway the first time she braked. It was only because she moved again that they knocked into her a few seconds later. In fact, it was about 4 seconds after Seoks braked before I felt the boom crash and all that. So they were actually condemning themselves.

But as I said, my Mandarin is horrendous, so I didn't dare speak up about that in case nobody understood me and I had to repeat myself and face such an awkward moment. And also, Seoks was getting pretty garang and the guy looked like he was about to start a gaduh or something. His gf also looked like want to slap people already. Violence everywhere! Aargh!

Anyway Seoks called her uncle, and the gaduh-guy called his dunno-who. The owner of the Merz, I suppose. Wah that guy ar, lagi garang. He came with a cigarette in his hand, and a packet of cigarettes. Didn't dress up like a typical ah beng samseng la (or is it samseng ah beng? Hmm) but fuh the way he walked and talked, really like the along in Hokkien TV shows. The samseng-guy admitted that it was the Then the gaduh-guy spoke up and said he was going very slow. But then FUH the samseng-guy suddenly raised his voice and said (yelled):

Ni zhou ji man ye shi ni de chuo! Ni shi hou mian de che! Ni zhe chien mian zhe yang wo ye bu dong ni! Zi ji zao chien pei!

Doinks man. So garang. I really chuak lor. Anyway, the samseng-guy was all nice guy when he talked to Seoks' uncle, and he gave him the address of his mechanic friend, and told Seoks' uncle to go there to repair the car.

After that, Seoks apologized to the gaduh-guy for getting him into such hot soup.

And she said that maybe it was a fate for her to get into the accident cuz she never listened to her uncle's advice against following a car so closely.

So all's well that ends well.

Unfortunately it didn't end very well for the gaduh-guy.

Watchnight BBQ

I did the rain proud. Hmm. I do not wish to comment on this.

We had a bbq at Unc Ivan's place at 7pm yesterday (errr Dec 31 la) till 12 am or so. Me and my siblings went home earlier cuz cannot tahan already. Except Shaun la. Hmm.

After I played a little with the waterworks, I went to the bathroom. After I came out, Aaron was there drinking water, and he asked me whether I was ok. So touched T_T I've never really asked him about how he was feeling or whether he was alright or things like that, so I felt bad a little when he asked me.

Auntie Jen and Auntie Tina fed me with hotdogs after that to help me feel better. Haha. I am now officially retiring from hotdogs and marshmellows!

After that, El came and sit beside me, and he teman me throughout the rest of the evaluation meeting la. Thank God for El! And he thanked me for encouraging him during the family camp. I said lots of things and did lots of things to lots of people. I really didn't think that anything I did would actually have an impact (maybe dun even have effect) on anyone. To hear him say that was something very encouraging to me also la. Like what I've been doing has not been in vain, and that the group discussion in camp had really been worth it.

Uncle Ivan and Marcus got me a cup and El filled the cup with water for me.

Evaluation ended, El left, and Zheng came over and asked how I was. I told him what I kept telling myself in the bathroom:

I don't know how that happened...

He told me it was because I'd been bottling everything up inside and so today everything spilled uh splashed out. Maybe.

Ok. Not maybe. It's memang la. Haiz.

Sharma came to entertain me with one of his crazy stunts, can't really remember what it was, but it was funny anyway. And it really helped me smile again. Not that I was miserable or wat, but after playing with waterworks, one tends to find it hard to smile, ya know? Hmm.

Chen Li just smiled knowingly at me when I looked at her during the programme planning. Heh. Who knows how many times I've given her the same look when she did the same thing I did last night (technically last night k).

Geng Yi just nudged me and grinned his goofy grin. As far as I'm concerned, that was and is all I need from him ^^ I recall giving him the same nudge but a nicer grin la when he shared during camp haha.

Shaun came over while we were praying and nudged me and said he was sorry for always poking fun at my "what's your spiritual condition" trademark phrase.
Frankly, I was never frustrated at him when he did it, cuz I know he takes the grp devo seriously. So I told him it was ok.

I ended the year 2006 in a way I never expected. I found many good things in many people and saw that I'm surrounded by people who want to be good and kind. And I also saw that I haven't been tapping into my capacity to be that way.

I want to care more about people, and to be able to show them that care... I've always seemed so indifferent because I was afraid my effort would look superficial or something. God taught me how to care yesterday. He gave me so many examples. I'm going to try and follow those examples.

Mum always says:

Don't say you'll try; say you will.

So I suppose I'll change that last sentence a little bit.

I WILL follow those examples!

Christmas Musical

Events: Christmas Evangelistic Event; Christmas Meeting
Venue: MGC
Time: 23 Dec 2006, Saturday, 7.30 pm; 25 Dec 2006, Monday, 10.00 am

So Christmas is over. And the play is over. Hmm.

I was grumbling about it so much before the thing but now I feel like I actually miss doing it. Hmm hmm. It was quite fun la. With all the interesting remixes Mark came up with, especially the Elvis one heheh. Anyway, I really learned some stuff throughout the process of the thing, and I think my piano skills have enhanced a little bit. At least now I know that I can play something other than simple arpeggios and those *bom-cha-cha things on the piano.

I'll try to put up the script when I have the time... and mood. Time is not a factor haha. Then it'll be easier to understand what we did that day. It's also a good way to remind myself that MGC is not made up of people who are totally tone-deaf and talentless.

When Mark told me Uncle Ivan approached him to help out with the play and that he needed the choir to do some singing thing in between, I went:

Huh? What choir? We don't have a choir!

Total doinkness, in short.

Anyhoo, it turned out well, and it helped me see that I really should change my negative melancholic attitude and just believe that the people of God can do something for Him just because He wants us to. I should stop limiting the church's ablilities because in doing so, I'm actually limiting His power.

23 December 2006, Morning of the Event - 11.00 am

Mark changed the script.

The singing (we had 18 songs; not the full song la, just part of it for some) was still the same, meaning no changes in songs, and the sketch was unchanged, but Mark added some other stuff in the narration. He initially adapted the idea of the script from Sin Lan's Christmas book, but then decided that it was too Christian, plus the transition from one scene to another was just too abrupt and awkward. So he adapted some stuff from his NOC script (sis said so wahaha) and adjusted here and there. He also added the narrating part from "A Child is Born" by Johnny Mathis.

So Shaun and sis went to church with the other actors to practice cuz they hadn't even finished the scenes yet. It was then that sis messaged me with some urgent messages about the play and called me to tell me to inform the choir members that we wouldn't have time to go back and bathe etc (practice at 4pm) and to bring their clothes and other essentials since there were major changes to the script.

I called Livia and Qi to tell them. Ah Zheng picked up the phone when I called the house, and he went to wake Qi up (alw seems to be sleeping... like a cat! Wow maybe that's why she always meows! ...What's with the woofs then?). Of course Qi couldn't wake up and so I heard him scolding her wahaha (wanted to laugh but I thought someone might hear me ahem), and when she finally came to the phone, her replies consisted of virtually only "uh". I think that's how it's spelled anyway. Basically, she sounded like she would go back to sleep and forget everything I told her. And since sis emphasized that the 4pm practice was crucial, with a capital C etc., a terrifying thought passed through my mind for an instant. No, not a thought. More of knowledge.

Sis would kill me if Qi forgot.

As any sensible scared-out-of-her-mind person would do, I messaged Zheng and told him what I told Qi. His reply was:

Oh. Ok. Do you want me to tell Ah Qi ar?

Doink. Did Qi really go back to sleep and not tell him about it? It's not like anything really bad would happen if they didn't bring their baju there right? It's just that they'd have to go home and they'd be late for the event and sis would freak out only mah. Err. Ya. Hmm. Anyway, I told him that I'd told her, so that was the end of it.

Marcus also called and told me that he was the songleader. And then he told me the songs some time later. Some last-minute-ness on the delegating by the coordinator, according to Marc.

23 December 2006, 3.00 pm

I had a look at the new script sis brought back. Lots of narration in between, and there were some parts that the choir was supposed to recite. They'd really need to practice. There was simply no time to memorize the thing. I was thinking: Wah so they hold the book and sing? So ugly...

Next, I had the inkling that Mark would want me to play some background music during the narrations. He'd already asked me to think of some Christmas songs to play. Jeez... I only play. I don't think of what to play. That's always been my problem. What I did for the last play was the same also. I just played what Mark and sis told me to play. I didn't have to think of what to play cuz they'd decide for me. I got worried about this. Sis comforted me with:

Just ignore him la.

Oh ok. That's easy.

Sis asked if I wanted to go practice with Marc at 3.30 pm for the singspiration. I said:

That means I'll have to go...

We glanced at the clock. 3pm. Our house is 30-45 min away from church. Sis:

Err... now.

Hmm. So tak jadi la.

23 December 2006, 4.00 pm - Pre-Practice

Mark assigned the readings pretty quickly, and soon everyone had their parts marked out on the booklet he'd printed out for everyone. Very nice booklet.

Some things happened on the way to church and in church la. Stuff like:

• Thought of the mics on the way to church. Thought they might be with Unc Anthony cuz he brought lots of stuff back from the Children's Hour Christmas Party the night before. WRONG! What about Unc Rod? Party was at his place anyway. WRONG! Finally found out that they were with Unc Tony. But he lives so far away... so had to ask him to come before 7.30pm with the mics. In the meantime, sis asked Mark to drop by Unc Rod's house to pick up the 2 mics that belonged to him first.
• Lin (Alto) had to go back to SUFES to give her supervisor the key
• Geng Yi & Kevin (Bass, Bass) messaged and said they'd be late cuz cleaning up Ju's place
  
• Zheng & Derk (Lights) suddenly disappeared when practice was about to start. Yik How had to take over temporarily. Switched back to Derk when he came back.
  
• Ju & Unc Anthony (Alto, Tenor) didn't appear until 3/5 thru practice cuz of the flood at his house
  
• Auntie Tina (Alto) quit the choir cuz of the flood at her house
  
• Mark (Director) was late for practice cuz of the booklets weren't done yet
  
• The projector was missing cuz Unc Tony took it home with him after using it at Unc Rod's place
  
• There weren't enough sockets to plug the church mics in
  
• No tinsel (vitally needed for the play) - Zheng had to go buy
  
• Lights for the choir weren't working out, so had to take out the 2 pendaflour lights so that we could turn on the set and have only 1 light on the choir
  
• Had to write chords for the musicians at the last minute cuz didn't know Marc wanted the full band
  

...and all sorts of other things. As sis put it: Everything and anything that could go wrong, went wrong.

We had a group prayer before practice, and sis cried while praying. It all seems so mild now, but at that point, I really felt that everything was just so messed up, and I didn't really believe that we could pull it off. I really hate doing things like this. I mean, it's not that I'm not a last-minute person la, but this was kinda too last-minute. And I knew that every single one of the people gathered at the piano to pray, including me, had done something last-minute. I couldn't help but wonder which person's last-minute job would cost the success of the play. If it was me, then I'd feel horrible. That's when it became really obvious that it really wasn't the time to point fingers at other people's mistakes, and that the only way the event would work out was if God Himself made it work out. Would God choose to bless us with a smooth, non-cacat event? Or with a lesson that leaving Him out of His own work will never work out?

I don't know what the rest were thinking, but I think Mark and sis and I were thinking the same thing: We can only do our best now. The rest is up to Him.

23 December 2006, 4.00 pm - Practice

As expected (and as feared), Mark wanted me to play something during the narration. He planned the thing with me until Scene 2. Then we had to start practice, so he told me to hentam. I couldn't really hentam cuz of what I said above la. And also cuz of the complications that materialized because of the piano's muffler system.

Piano Clinic! (Copy Eyeshield haha)
A typical piano would usually have 3 pedals:

1. Left Never really used it, and no one really told me about it, so from what I observe, I think it's just to produce a staccato effect on the keys. In short, it's the opposite of the sustain pedal. Rarely used.
   
2. Centre Muffles the sound of the piano. Rarely used.
   
3. Right Sustains the sound of the keys. Always used.
   

Problem is, the church piano's muffle pedal is an odd one. It wouldn't muffle the sound even if you step on it with a 1 ton shoe. The only way to muffle is to put down the muffler bar inside the piano (on top of the hammer butts). The bar has 2 pieces of cloth hanging below it that will rest on the hb and muffle the sound by being a barrier between the hb and the strings that they hit. (The piano works based on the hitting of hb against the strings; therefore it's considered both a percussion and string instrument)

Mark said the music was too loud during the sketch (they weren't using mics). I tried touching the keys lightly, but it was still too loud. So I had to use the muffler bar. But during the singing and narration, I had to lift it up again. And since I have short arms -_-|||, I had to stand up every time I wanted to lift the bar. If it were only that, it would still be fine. But in between, I also had to flip the pages of the booklet. And since every section needed a different background song, I needed time to scan through the next section before playing so that I wouldn't play the wrong stuff. All different keys somemore! At that point, I also hadn't decided what song to play yet, so I had to think and play and flip and lift at the same time. It was really a sit-stand-flip-play-think time for me. I kept making mistakes like playing the wrong song, playing in the wrong key, and not playing when I was supposed to play.

Aargh.

A pianist is useless when she can't play.

23 December 2006, 7.15 - 7.40 pm

Nobody was really there yet, so I took this time hastily down less than half of my dinner and change. I also went scouting for someone to help me with the piano. Criteria:

1. Long arms
2. Alert, sensible, and with at least a little bit of music sense... if don't have then nvm la...
   
3. Been to most of the practices, especially the last one
   

Sin Lan would usually be my first choice, but she was one of the actors. Yen Mei was singing. Shaun and Sharma were acting. Marcus was singing. Besides, he can be pretty blur at times. Haha. Not saying that I'm not blur kkkkk. Sis was the conducter. Derk was with the lights. Adrian was the powerpoint person. Lin was also singing (She has short arms anyway muahaha)! I can't ask Seok Ling!!!!

I scouted and hunted, and finally I decided that the only person left was Ah Zheng. But wasn't he supposed to do the lights or something? Eh? Turned out he was totally free. So he ended up as my crucial assistant.

23 December 2006, 8.00 pm - Jeng Jeng Jeng!

I took the games time to outline and highlight what I was supposed to play. I thanked God for the games time when I could finally cool my head and do some planning. To my horror, Jess only planned one game, and so one game it was. And that game was a pretty short one. Thankfully, I finished the thing. Well, sort of. It was so cakar ayam I was afraid I wouldn't be able to read it during the play.

After the games, it was immediately our turn. And we were all, wut... so fast... cannot...
Something like that la. I was like that anyway. But it didn't feel as awful as before la. Zheng came over and said:

Time for some page-flipping action.

Dot dot dot.

After Scene 1, Zheng relaxed and said: Good, good. It's very good.

Really? I felt I'd started too fast for the first 2 songs. No time to dwell on that though. I only had a brief 15 seconds a capella narration part to prepare myself for the next scene.

Anyway, things went as planned, and maybe better than planned.

The choir sang in tune! And so berperasaan! Marcus usually looks so distracted when he sings, but when it was time for his solo, he was so ber-feel. Sis said so la. I was too busy looking at the next section to look at the choir. One of the only times I really looked at what the choir was doing was when Unc Anthony sang his solo. Cuz I needed to follow his timing and it was a pretty slow and out-of-time kind of rendition, so I had to read his lips. Wahhhhhh so emo man! Esp the "a baby born one blessed nightttttttttttttttttttt" part wahahahahhahahahahaha.

Oh ya. When Mark assigned some sentences to Qi, she said it so mati-ly and so tak-emo-ly. But sis told him to give it to her anyway cuz she was doing it on purpose.

Wah. She actually said it properly. Except for some parts where she was nervous la.

Computer stuff will be old even before you get it out of the box

Wahahahahha! And she smiled! She smiled!!!! I saw her million-dollar smile when they were singing "My Christmas Gift" on the "stage". I was playing, but I turned and told Zheng: Qi's smiling! Qi's smiling!
He looked startled, then immediately took out his handphone and snapped that very rare picture of Qi with the ends of her mouth curved up haha. Oh, and she swayed properly too.

Yen Mei also did very well with her solo, and the Geng Yi-Yen Mei-Kevin part went well. Actually only Yen Mei and Geng Yi doing the duet, but Geng Yi can't sing in tune without someone there to guide him (Yen was doing the 2nd voice), so Kevin (standing beside him mah) had to sing the song into his ear while GY sang his part. Hence the trio.

The sketch was really hilarious. Jeremy was especially expressive. He always practices sambil-lewa-ly, but when the real thing comes, he pours his heart and soul into it. Shaun played the dumb one at first, always asking what this was for and what that was for. But he developed into a more intelligent being haha. After that he was the one who found this and found that in the ornament box. Sharma and Sin Lan did their parts very well, and everyone's voice rang loud and clear! The audience laughed most of the time during the sketch ^^ I laughed pretty much too la haha.

23 December 2006, 8.00 pm - Post-Musical

What made me really happy that day was the fact that Seok Ling (best friend) kept her promise and came for the event. At 7.40 pm somemore! Late la, but not technically cuz everyone else came around that time also. In fact, she was one of the earliest. Hmm.

Kathy (former classmate) and Yong Qiang (fencing club prez) also came. Was really surprised to see those two. Adrian invited them both. I felt a little ashamed that I didn't invite Kathy myself. After all, we were from the same kindergarten, the same secondary school class, and for 1 month, from the same F6 bio class. I guess it was cuz I'd invited her before in the past, and she'd always not turn up, except for once in F1/F2, when she came for Sports Day or something. I shouldn't have given up like that. That day, I realized that I'd given up on virtually all my friends, except Seok Ling, and that mum was right when she said I'm always sticking to my old friends. I should be going out into the field to be a fisher of men, but what am I doing picking on the same fish-man (hmm) all the time?

I'm glad Adrian invited them, cuz I really got closer to them that night. I've never really said anything important to Kathy, except a few polite remarks and expressions. Although I worked with Yong Qiang for Hari Ko-ku (our clubs merged), I didn't talk to him after that, and I could barely bring myself to give him a polite smile or wave when I saw him. He's a very nice person, and I wonder how I could've thought of him as a scary (he's the fencing club prez! Tikam people wan noe) and unapproachable person. He's actually quite funny haha.

I always thought that I can't mix with people and the only close friends I'll ever have is Seok Ling, and some of MGC people. But sitting around the table together like that helped me see that I can make friends, and I can make close friends, if I just overcome my shyness and negative perception of people.

In Conclusion (Finally, right? Haha)

All in all, I'd say that God chose to bless us with both a smooth event, and a well-needed lesson about how we are supposed to live for God as His chosen people.

We are citizens of heaven and ambassadors for Christ. Live with that dignity.

Amen.

*Bom-cha-cha is mostly MGC pianists' playing style which I think no other church's pianist use cuz I've never seen anyone use it. Are we simply using a unique style or we just outdated? Hmm.
*Staccato is a jumpy effect

Look at Ken

He's sleeping so soundly. Not a care in the world on the little face.

Isn't it odd how we, grown people can go to sleep and still look like we're burdened with a great load of care?
Isn't it odd how we've lost the ability to really fall asleep?

Why is it that the little ones seem to be so much happier, and so much more free?
Why is it that we look at their "troubles" and "cares" and say: "What do they know?"
Why is it that we seem to have bigger "troubles" and "cares"?

Is it a rule that as we grow bigger, our problems do the same?
Is it real? Or is it just psychological?
We think that children were never made to shoulder cares and problems.
It is when we look at children who are pushed by their parents to excel that we say "That shouldn't be"
It is when we look at standard 1 kids who go for tuitions that we say "They're too young for tuition la"

Back to the matter at hand... Is it the result of a chain reaction?

People think that as we grow bigger, we should do bigger things, take on heavier responsibilities and produce greater results. Consequently, we strive to do better, to produce the desired results. What happens is we take on those burdens just because people expect us to.

Is the question really whether children should be carrying burdens?
Or is it whether we should be carrying so much at all?

Is the size of our problems really what differentiates us from children?

Is that why Jesus said in Matthew 18:3 ~

Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

We usually take it to mean that we must be humble and teachable, devoid of our own selfish interests, but couldn't Jesus have meant something else as well?

Remember what He said in Matthew 6:34 ~

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

How strange... Most of what I remember now, as a student and as a Christian and as a person, stems from what I learned as a child.
Can it be that we actually learn much more as children than as "big people"?

How is it that I could quote the Little Mermaid's lines perfectly before she even spoke them, whereas I can't even properly quote a single line from the tv ads that I see everyday?

And so strange how sometimes we get the feeling that we learn more from children than they do from us.

Is that why we're born again as spiritual babies instead of shooting straight to "mature" Christians?
After all, most of us are already grown people. We've got lots of experiences under our belt, haven't we?

Is it because God knows that we learn more as children than we ever will as adults?

"The One" Tag

This is Eugin's tag. I refuse to use the original title of the tag, My Perfect Lover. Firstly, as Eugin rightly said, there is no such thing as the perfect lover. Secondly, the word "lover" in Middle English means someone you have illicit love with. Thirdly, I'm not looking. The word "my" makes me sound a little desperate and romantic. I am not a romantic. I'm just a sentimental person with a soft heart *cough*. And I am most definitely not desperate. So there!

Anyway, I'm supposed to list down 8 points about "The One". Oh, I'm supposed to state the gender first. Of course male la.

1. Someone who can properly be the head of the family and guide me whenever I'm confused in my spiritual walk. A devoted Christian, to be precise.
   
2. Someone who is not a hopeless romantic (because then he'll expect me to do something hopelessly romantic for him, which I can't, because I'm not a hopeless romantic).
   
3. Someone who can correct me without sounding condescending or insulting me.
4. Someone who can tame my argumentative nature by simply being so peaceful that I don't want to be so argumentative, NOT someone who gives in to my every complaint and argument just because he doesn't want to upset me.
   
5. Someone who lets me know when he's hurt by the things I say and do without being pitiful.
6. Someone who knows that he doesn't need to do big things to make me happy because he knows that little things like computer mouse boxes make my day.
7. Someone who lets me know what he likes and dislikes simply because he knows it means a lot to me.
   
8. Someone who replies my sms-es and at least gives me a miss call when it's his turn to end an sms exchange in which the need to sms just to say "ok" or "yes" is unnecessary.
   

"The Fours" Tag

Pei Ling's tag.

Four things not many people know about me...

• I'm a sentimental person. Really la. What's with that skeptical look?? Contrary to popular belief, I'm the one who keeps all your birthday cards and sis is the one who chucks them all away as rubbish.
  
• I get drunk easily. And I mean easily. My cheeks get really red and if I'm playing the piano, I play nonsense. I get drunk after 10pm when I'm out of the house or doing an assignment in the house. For the record, I don't take alcohol. This drunken phenomenon is usually triggered by a bite of cheese-cake or a sip of plain water. Geez... I wonder what'll happen if I actually drink more than a sip of wine on Sunday...
• I can't tell the difference between sweet and sour stuff.
  
• I EAT SAMBAL! I do! I do!
  

Four movies I could watch over and over...

• The Little Mermaid
• Beauty and the Beast
• Lion King
• Swan Princess. I love Disney movies. Does anyone else have the desire to state the obvious?
  

Four places I've lived...

• Old house in Taman Asean
  
• Current house in Bukit Katil
• In the toilet, probably. Once I was in there so long sis thought I'd died in there.
  
• I dunno... how do you define "lived"? All living organisms need to eat, breathe, and sleep right? I eat, breathe and sleep in the car. Does that count?
  

Four TV shows I love(d) to watch...

• Whose Line Is It Anyway?
• B...ar...ney...
• Sesa...me... St...ree...t
• He-Man. Haha. Seriously. I loved He-Man. He looks silly now, though. Hence the (d) after love, I suppose.
  

Four places I've been on vacation...

• Kevin and Mel's house in Johor! Loved it!
  
• Ah Mah's house! Loved the time we rolled the mattress up and crawled through it pretending to be explorers trapped in a cave. We turned off the lights and it was veryyy dark. Wonder if hell's like that...
• China. Didn't understand what the tour guide was saying. Loved the hotel bathrooms though.
• See Kheng and See Han's house in Singapore. Wish I could remember more about the house than the computer though.
  

Four of my favourite foods...

• SANDWICHES!!!
  
• Taman Asean wan tan mee
  
• Fried rice
  
• Chicken cooked in black gravy
  

Four places I would rather be...

• Heaven
  
• I love Malaysia. I love Malacca. There's no place I'd rather be. Other than the one above.
  

Four favourite songs (this hour)...

• I Don't Know About Tomorrow
  
• Not That Far From Bethlehem - Point of Grace
  
• Days of Elijah
• Part of Your World - The Little Mermaid

Four people I tag...

• I refuse to tag anyone. Because I'm a nice person. Muahaha.
  

Briefly, I Speak

Yen Mei has the photos on her blog, so I'll wait till later to write about it. So many surprises these days. So tired haha. But fun la. Especially since I get to drive!

Anyway, I finally understand what a tag is, or more precisely, what it means to be tagged. Dumb dumb hor. I really didn't get it when Pei Ling said she tagged me and so I must do the tag. I was like, har? What's a tag? Do what?

Then ~ a few days ago, Eugin tagged me. THEN I realized what a tag is. Hmm. Now that I know, I see that it's actually not a very good thing to be tagged ^^; Anyhoo, I'll do Pei Ling's first, for the sake of fairness (too odd to use the word "justice").

Before that, I went through Ling's old blog site, and I clicked on the people links there. I clicked "Andrew", and I read his funny blog.

I'm gonna quit blogging. I'm not made, correction not trained to be a blogger nor do I have the vast experience to spice up this space. Pro blogging is just so, out of my league. Looking at a different perspective, blogging, for normal people, may give reasons like "to update my friends". What "friends"? Why not just call them out and catch up? Friends who read and just shrug it off. Haha. Other lala-fied bloggers, most people have no idea what they're yapping about. Posting "fill in questionaires 2000", such lame-ness I see in them.

Who actually reads them anyway?

However, blogs with rich content and stuff. I stress on rich content. By all means, continue your wonderful work. It's interesting. Might get to learn a thing or two. Might I add blogs with passion and interest, great photo(graph/shop) skills. People who love what they do. Those are good stuff. Not blogs who complain about things. That's like what I'm doing now, cursing you average bloggers. Haha. No offense intended (or do I)

Good night people. Gun me down. I'm living in a hut near you. Rawr. You'll never hear from me anymore.












or I could start posting really good materials. heh, just a thought

The quote link on my browser is gone cuz of the stuff Blogspot did the other day, and I'm too lazy to clear my browser cache again, so I'll just do some lazy stuff with the quote up there. But the point is, both sis and I thought it was really an amusing post. And we noticed he had many months' archives already, so we went, wut... now only decide not to blog sumore?? Haha.

It's 12.09 am already. I'm supposed to go swimming with sis at 8am tomorrow and then go to SUFES to practice the christmas songs with Lin at 3pm. Haiz. Long day. Not much time to do my math. Not that I was overly eager to do math la.

So I promise I'll do the tags sometime soon, and also post about Ju's birthday surprise. Kinda going through writer's block nowadays. Maybe I'm using too much brainpower on playing the piano for the choir. Haiz. Stressful la.

Talk later. Buhbye ~

Ju's Birthday Surprise

Yesterday, um, today, we went to Ju's house to surprise her. I'll update later cuz now I've got to learn up a new song in time to teach Marcus later. But all I've got to say about yesterday's, um, today's, experience is...

I LOVE SANDWICHES!!!!!!!!

Updates later.

Blah Blah Blah

Christmas *Ding Dong Ding Dong*

Mark, sis and I (more of Mark and sis la) completed 2 scenes for the Christmas thingy. It's already 12:48 am, so I won't go to all the trouble of elaborating. No one really reads it, I think. And the people who do, like MARK (yes, I know you're here - First Wave), are mostly involved in the play already anyway. There are 9 scenes anyhow, and I really can't imagine doing a write-up for each of them =.= I still need to study for Upper 6 ahem ahem.

Mark came over again today to discuss another scene. We managed to finish up part of Scene 5 , so sis and I can teach the girls their parts on Wednesday or something. Mark will visit
again on Thursday.

Which reminds me.

GP tuition on Thursday. Haiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

But it's not too bad. Miss Heng talks a lot about law and politics, and the two happen to be my favourite topics! ^^ And I get to drive!

Wait.

Don't think I remember the road. Heck. I don't think I ever knew the road.

SUFES

Sis and I worked today! Yay. Yeah, without the exclamation mark.

I got up at 7.30 am and after carrying out my daily ritual of reading in the bathroom, and after doing all those other stuff people do when they wake up, sis and I headed for work. Parked, pulled up metal thingys, blah blah blah... and we started work.

Work.

What is work?

W = Length x time? Did I get that right? I've been out of touch with science for a year *yippee*

Nah.

If I were to base my definition of work on today's marvellous experience, I would say that work is basically sitting around doing nothing.

As the hours dragged along painfully, I found myself agreeing with CK's heartfelt statement of working adults: They're wasting their life away, man!

Haiz schimaiz ~ It's 1:03 am already. My kidney has started it's 24/7 cycle of whatever it's doing, and I've already missed the 9pm -11pm and the 11pm - 1pm cycle. I hope they're not important *cough* So off I am to sleep. Updates tmr. If I'm not busy doing my math.

zzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz

Today, Today, and Today

Christmas Choir

Mark's coming over later to discuss some stuff about the Christmas choir thingy. Mark's a fussy director, so I hope I won't be too intimidated haha ~

He just found out that the meeting on the 23rd is supposed to be evangelistic, so I suppose he'd have to make some changes to the programme that he already has in mind. Basically, it's all about explaining a christmas tree. The ornaments and decorations on the tree would help unfold the story of Christmas. For example (Mark's favourite quote), when we talk about the star at the top of the tree, the choir will sing about the star or something la, then the actors will do a sort of flashback to the days when the wise men followed the star to where Jesus was. As the narration continues, the bare tree will be fully decorated.

There's a problem though. Logically, the star should be the last to be revealed. Cuz it's sort of like the climax of the tree, plus it's literally the climax cuz it's at the top of the tree la. But if we were to mention it last, that would mean the story would be chronologically jumbled up cuz the story of the star begins first. So Mark is still wondering whether he should be chronologically accurate in terms of the story, or in terms of the order of appearance of the ornaments.

I think if the meeting is to be the regular Christmas service, it would be perfectly alright to do the latter one. But since it's evangelistic, the non-Christians would probably get confused if we jump about the story like that.

Lin says it'll be boring (actually she said it IS boring), and Mark said so himself, but... But what? I have nothing positive to say here haha. I was sort of thinking: If know boring then do somemore for what? It's perfectly reasonable for me to think that right ^^; Anyway, I think it's a pretty interesting concept. Lin says we should do a musical but not like the one we did last year. She wants some lively songs like the ones in The Phantom of the Opera. I was like, doink! Lively eh the ones in PTO? I thought they were quite ridiculous.

Anyway, Mark was supposed to be here at 8pm, but he messaged me to say he'll be a little late cuz he needs to have dinner with his mum, who came all the way here from Penang. I always thought it odd that Mark's always more than willing to spend his time and perhaps his whole life doing this sort of drama and play stuff, whereas his energy completely vanishes when he has to listen to a sermon in church or when he needs to study. Maybe he uses too much energy for his arts activities. Hmm. I salute him for his enthusiasm in working on projects like these though.

WinLinez and Eggs

This is the game that I'm currently interested in. Go check it out online la. It's supposed to be a logic game, but I don't think so la, since I can play it better than sis. It's kinda a known fact that I lack quite a bit of common sense and logic. Ok la, maybe not too much of logic, more of common sense. But sis is supposed to be more logical than me. Hmm.

It's the only game I can beat her at. The Eggs game is horrendous, in my opinion. I'm like the only one in the house who can't play it -_- It's a game where you have to make the egg jump from one egg basket to another one. There's a timer going on, but it's kind of um ignorable. Eh? I thought there wasn't such a word, but then the dictionary says there is. Muahahha. I'm smart la. Ahem.

Anyway, the main objective of the game (ignoring my perasanness heheh) is to get the egg to the topmost basket, with a FINISH banner over it. There isn't a High Score Board cuz everyone gets the same score when they arrive at the last basket. The time used isn't even recorded, so personally I feel it's a silly game. Ahem. Not because I can't play it! Bluek.

Sufes

Sis and I are going to work at Sufes for a day on Monday cuz Lin will be going up to Shah Alam, Sin Lan will be in KL (I think), the other worker "retired" already, and the superviser will also be in KL. Hope no customer on that day hehehe. Now I know how Mel and Ju feel when they were working at Salvation ^^; But this is kinda different la. The system here is quite disorganized, and the books are mostly for the Chinese-Ed. I can read and write a little Chinese la, but suppose they asked me to search for a Chinese dunno-what book by a dunno-who author - how am I supposed to survive la? I was telling sis I'd be in charge of the phone. Then I'll only have to say:

Hello, this is Pustaka Sufes. How may I help you?

Sounds so pro somemore right! But then sis said:

If they speak in Mandarin, how?

...............................................Silence.................................................

Qing den yi xia. (Jie! Take the call!)

See? So easy. I mmg pandai.

Anyway, I'm off to play WinLinez somemore. Buhbye ~

Mostly About Tomorrow, Today, and Some Yesterday

Sis's Blog

I Am Noob

Hi. I am Lim Tse Shuen. I am new at this blog stuff. So I am writing like a newbie. Cough cough. Wahahaha.

(Sumber: Dipetik daripada Shuen Said Something, shuensays. blogspot.com, 2006)

Heheh. Sis asked me to create a blog for her a veryyy long time ago, and I did la. But then she never found the time to post something, so she didn't really get to delete the post I posted for her when I first created the blog for her muahaha. Those who took Form 6 PA will at least giggle a little bit at the sumber part. I mean, you should la. If you don't, it doesn't mean I'm a lame joker, it means something's wrong with you buahaha ~

Happy Feet

I'm going to watch Happy Feet tomorrow. I was looking forward to it actually, but then suddenly have to fetch people and collect tickets, so I also suddenly don't feel like going anymore. I just want to go for a movie without having to go 45 minutes earlier. Haiz. Nevermind. (Hey is it never mind or nevermind?)

Extra Class

Anyway I've got extra class for Math S this whole week except tomorrow. But that's ok, cuz

1. I get to drive to school!!!! Myself!!!! Yay!!!!
2. I like math anyway.
3. Mdm Chah sez she'll bring a sponge cake for us to eat on Wednesday. Yeah!!!! (yao kui... me, not Mdm Chah...)

Sis is Back!!

It'll be much nicer if sis could say, "I am back!!" on her blog. I'll throw in that suggestion hmm.
Sis taught me a song today: He. Yeah, at first when she told me about it last month, I thought it was Hee or something cuz it's really kinda weird to name a song He. It actually sounds like a pop song or something. But anyway it's really nice, and now it's one of my favourite songs! Heheh. Here it goes:

He can turn the tides
And calm the angry sea.
He alone decides
Who writes a symphony.
He lights ev'ry star
That makes our darkness bright.
He keeps watch all through
Each long and lonely night.
He still finds the time
To hear a child's first prayer.
Saint or sinner call
And always find Him there.
Though it makes him sad
To see the way we live,
He'll always say, "I forgive."

He can grant a wish
Or make a dream come true.
He can paint the clouds
And turn the gray to blue.
He alone knows where
To find the rainbow's end.
He alone can see
What lies beyond the bend.
He can touch a tree
And turn the leaves to gold.
He knows every lie
That you and I have told.
Though it makes him sad
To see the way we live,
He'll always say, "I forgive."

Nice leh. I'm looking for the mp3 cuz sis isn't sure of the tune, and dad sometimes sings the wrong one, and the one online is horrendous. Hmm. Maybe the tune will come to me in a dream tonight. Whoa. Maybe not.

Shaun wants to use the com already, and I have a headache anyway. So I'll be blogging some other time. Prob after Happy Feet tomorrow.

Jonker

Is it Jonker Street or Jonker Walk anyway? I know it changed from one name to the other but I can't remember which one changed to the other. Ehhh whatever ~

Anyway I went to Jonker's yesterday with Wan Ting, Ben, and Seok Ling. I was supposed to meet up with Pei Ling, Zheng and the rest of the KGC people (I think) but tak jadi la. Here's a brief summary before I head off to the night meeting.

6.30 pm

Wan Ting and Ben came to get me near the bus stand which I insist is cute. It is la k. I mean, it's worn down and stuff but it's still special. Somehow. Hmm.

Oh ya, before that, Ling messaged to say that they were heading to town to have ikan bakar for dinner with Unc Kian and Auntie Kiat Tin. Somewhere around 6pm, I think. Dunno la.

7.00 pm

Good ol' Jonker. Dunno about 'good' but it was definitely old. Hmm. Wan Ting treated me to herbal egg and liang teh, and some gooey stuff which if I heard correctly is mou chi or mau chi. Hmm. I'm a sua ku. I learned these two words because they kept calling me that the whole night -_-

Oh ya, before that, Ben parked his car (technically not his, it was Wan Ting's mum's car) at the foot of St. Paul's Hill. I got the night view of the "Historical Area" of Malacca, and I was kinda wondering how I managed to miss the beauty of it before. There's something about tall, stately buildings that gives me that feeling of awe and admiration when I look at them. It's like in the movies where the lady looks around and the buildings just seem to surround her and she can't help but smile because it's all just so awesome. That's how I felt that night.

And although I thought the windmill looked pretty ridiculous with all those colourful lights decorating its - what do you call them - mills?... haha... whatever la... you get what I mean - I couldn't help feeling a sense of adventure sweep over me as I tried to imagine that this cozy little state was once colonized by the Dutch, Portugese, and Brits!

8.00 pm

We finished walking the whole stretch. If I had a watch, I would have been glancing at it the whole time, wondering when Ling and the rest would be there. A sword guy showed off his authentic and real swords to us. And Wan Ting politely nodded and smiled while Ben and I stood there wondering how we should react. Psst: I was actually thinking of asking him to let me hold the sword - I always wanted to hold one =P Seoks came along and joined us at the cozy little shop with the beautiful little boxes and mirrors that I love so much.

We also took a look at the dumb dumb voodoo dolls that are supposedly a big hit nowadays. Seoks told me that she was a skeptic at first, but one fine day, her friend gave her one, and she threw it away cuz it was ugly la, then the very next day (or was it two days later? Hmm) she got into an accident and something bad happened (won't tell me what).

I was like =_= Hmm. I wasn't afraid to show her that face cuz she mmg know I don't believe this kind of stuff la. Anyway, those voodoo things are supposed to help you snag your crush by simply giving one doll to him / her. Dumb. I do not believe that my fate lies in the hand of a silly, ugly, man-made doll. It's not even cute. Hmmph.

8.33 pm?

Ling messaged and said they had just arrived at Medan Ikan Bakar. Initial reaction was, wut? You guys took 2 hours to get there? Got lost eh? I was actually quite hungry cuz I hadn't eaten yet. Wan Ting had planned to take me to Malim Pasar Malam for dinner, but Seoks said Ling & co. might turn up and then it'll be a waste of time cuz Malim is quite far from Jonker's. Of course, I wouldn't know anything about that. All I know is there are generally soya bean and tong sui at pasar malams.

So we took off in Wan Ting's mum's car and bought some food that I'd never tasted before - some only k i'm not that sua ku - and since I didn't receive any message from Ling saying that they were at Jonker's, we took the food to Wan Ting's place to makan. Here're the ratings:

• Taiwan Hot Dogs: 9/10
• Hong Kong Chee Cheong Fun: 5/10
• Kari-dunno-what-thing: -1/10 (cuz I'm orang yang tak makan pedas)
• Tengkera Putu Piring: 8/10
• Chicken Wing: 10/10

Um.. please note that my ratings are a little biased cuz I really dislike the foods that I don't eat, and really love the foods that I do eat. I really love hot dogs and chicken wings (sounds odd, like I'm referring to both wings on the chicken instead of the plural of chicken wing... eh apa ni), so I'd give very high ratings to the two even if not very nice =P

9.14 pm

Ling: We're at jonker's!

I only saw the message at 9.30 pm cuz I'd fallen asleep in Wan Ting's house (on her bed ^^;). I dunno why la. My brain sort of switches off on Friday nights. You can imagine how horribly sleepy I feel during Friday Bible studies ya. Eh the sleepiness is not because of the Bible study k. Don't slander me!

I told the rest, and Wan Ting said it was too late already. I actually wanted to go, but then... sit people's car... invade people's house... sleep on people's bed... use people's pillow... where got face to make request somemore right? I messaged Ling:

I'm at my friend's house now. You guys go ahead and go home if I can't make it there in time.

Then I tried to subtlely get away from Wan Ting's house to Jonker's =_= Hope she never finds my blog ^^||| So I stood up and made the first move to leave la, although I actually had no say whatsoever in the matter cuz I couldn't drive the car for some obvious reasons which I will list down anyway:

1. I'm buta jalan. So I dunno how to get to Jonker's on my own.
2. The car was manual, and I haven't been driving a manual car cuz Sis took the Kelisa to UPM.
3. It wasn't my car, for goodness' sake.

Anyway, they followed my lead after a few seconds of awkwardness, I think =P The plan was that Ben would drive us to Jonker's for Seoks to get her car, then he'd drive me home, cuz his house's only 10 minutes away from mine. By then it was 10.15, I think. I dunno what we did until so long after Ling's message. Did I fall asleep again? Hmm. I thought they might've gone home or were ready to go home already. So I messaged Ling and asked if they were still there.

Ling: Yup, we're still here. Come come, almost at the end of the stretch.

Something like that la. I don't exactly have photographic memory plus my brain was almost dead already k. I broke the news to Seoks and Ben. I didn't know what I was trying to achieve, actually. I mean, I couldn't expect Ben to wait for me cuz pleaseeee la, how could I ask Wan Ting's boyfriend to teman me?? Then if Ben went home without me, Seoks would have to drive me home instead, although she was more than willing to teman me la (so nice eh my best friend muahaha), and her house's like super far from mine.

Anyway, they were both very nice. They knew how much I'd been looking forward to this thingy, so Seoks offered to stay back with me and then drive me home afterward. I didn't know what to say cuz it seemed too selfish to ask that of her. So Ben told me to think about it on the way there (got lots of time cuz so far). So I slept first (as usual).

We were actually outside Jonker's only - very near - and I could've just told them I wanted to go meet the others and they would've let me. But then I declined for the reasons stated above and also because I was too sleepy already. So Ben let Seoks down and we took off lor.

I was just messaging Ling about it when she suddenly called me. I was like fuh~~~ chuak la. So I picked it up (half-asleep), and whose voice did I hear? Guess yourself la eh. Hint: It was a real masculine voice =.= Let me give you a rough sketch of the conversation:

Hi. This is Pei Ling. *chuckles and giggles in the background*
Hmm. Ok.
Where are you now? *chuckles and giggles in the background*
I don't think I'm going anymore. You guys go ahead la.
Ohhh ok. *chuckles and giggles in the background*
Hmm.
Oh oh Ah Zheng says ok but Pei Ling says she's angry. *chuckles and giggles in the background*
What? (too sleepy)
Ah Zheng says ok but Pei Ling says she's angry. *chuckles and giggles in the background*
Hmm. Ok.
Ok la. I'll see you tmr. *mega chuckles and giggles in the background*
Hmm --
Eh I mean Ah Zheng will see you tmr. I'm going back, to Kajang... my hometown. *ultra chuckles and giggles in the background*
Hmm. Ok.
Bye. *chuckles and giggles in the background*
Bye.

The one in red's "Pei Ling" and the one in gray is me la. Try and guess who's that la hor -_-

11.15 pm

Finally arrived home and messaged Ling about not meeting up. I told her I'd go visit her one day in Kajang ^^; Good la. Less pressure, cuz then I wouldn't have to play the host buahahahahahhaahahahahahhahaha ~


To tell the truth, I almost got very angry yesterday. Firstly, I didn't find Jonker very satisfying anyway, except the little boxes shop la. There were also some other stuff at Jonker that I didn't like:

• The silly idea of poking a hole in a coconut with a finger is by itself the most absurd thing anyone could think of. It's even more absurd when you actually do it. To those who dunno what I'm talking about, I'm referring to the guy who puts up a coconut-poking performance at Jonker's.
  
• The stall which puts up a caged puppy. That's such an awful thing to do. The puppy's cute la, but using the puppy's asset to imprison it is such a demeaning thing, even if the puppy doesn't really have that sort of consciousness. How would you feel if someone did that to your pet dog??

Secondly, I don't go out often, and when I do, I do so with a purpose. When that initial purpose is not fulfilled, I get frustrated, even if that purpose is replaced by another. Thirdly, Seoks, Wan Ting, and Ben went to teman me, actually, cuz they knew that I'm not exactly the interact-well-in-crowds type. So when I didn't get to meet Ling and the others, I felt like I'd just wasted their time.

And it didn't help much when Zheng asked me why I didn't go to Jonker's like I fang fei ji liddat. And it really didn't help at all when Qi (Zheng's sis) snorted and said: "Never go" when I talked about Jonker today during group devotion.

But thank God there are such things as a comfortable bed, a warm blanket, air-con, and sleep ~

What the Lawyer Said

Dad brought me to meet his lawyer friend, Robert Ang, the other day, along with a few of his other business partners. More like shareholders la. They're all involved in this big thingy to rescue Ornapaper from crumbling in the hands of Datuk Ting. Since it's supposed to be some big thing, I suppose I can't really talk about it here, and Gary DID tell me that it's pretty easy to bump into the blog of an acquaintance on while blog-jumping. That's how Pei Ling found my blog neway +_=

Back to the lawyer. Well, he's not technically a lawyer la. He went down the same path my dad did (except dad took accountancy) and went to be an apprentice of the lawyers, picking up bits and pieces of law along the way. Since he was too lazy to take the professional law exam, he set up a law firm instead and recruited lawyers to work for him. He drafts out the cases for the lawyers, then sends them to fight the case in court. Dad told me that he's so good at his job that he once turned a bankrupt case alive and won back the guy's assets and cash by highlighting a tiny error in one of the documents.

Ok. So dad told him that I want to take law after form 6, so Mr Robert started talking la (he talks a lot - will I be like that in future? Hmm). I'll organize it for you so that it doesn't look too messy.


To Be or Not To Be? That is the Question.

He used to tell his 2nd son not to be a lawyer. Here's why - His first son's a devil, but his second son's an angel.

Case 1 - Money on the ground
1st son - Takes off with the money and buys something for himself
2nd son - Runs around looking for a charity box and then deposits the money into it

Case 2 - Phone call from client for dad
1st son - Willingly lies that his dad is not home
2nd son - Refuses to lie that his dad is not home and doesn't believe his dad's reasoning that it's not a lie, but a half-truth

So he said that by his assessment, his 2nd son failed as a lawyer. So he's now somewhere out there (Australia, I think), happily married and an animation technician. Hmm.

Mr Rob said:

We don't teach you to tell lies, we teach you to tell half-truths.

I was like, um ok, what's the difference between a lie and a half-truth again? I didn't say that out loud la.

Lawyers, Accountants, and Doctors

He then enlightened me on the difference between lawyers, accountants, and doctors.

Lawyers
We are still ok, cuz we don't tell lies. We tell half-truths.

Accountants
They are worse, they tell lies. They show you what you want to see in your accounts. They set aside the losses first, and present the profit first, especially when they have to meet an important person that day, such as someone from the bank.

Doctors
Lawyers and accountants at least still can double check la. Like if you're not satisfied with their services, or if you found a mistake, then can ask for compensation. But if doctors operate on you, then make a mistake, you have no way of knowing because they'll stitch you up. So you won't know! No knowledge means no compensation!

Mr Rob said:

So if doctors want to argue with you about which career is the best, you just tell them that.

Ok. But I think I'd rather just walk away peacefully ^^;


Towards the end of the meal (we were having lunch), dad asked Mr Rob if I could work for him while waiting for my STPM results. He said ok!

Hmm.

I think I can learn a lot from Mr Rob, but I'm also worried. Cuz all the time he was talking about his 2nd son, I was thinking: Gosh. That's what I would have done also.

=.=" Do I fail then as a lawyer? I refuse to believe that being a lawyer means giving up the attribute of honesty. I refuse to believe that being a lawyer means giving up my testimony as a Christian. I refuse to believe all that!

But somehow I have this feeling - like in the drama series, where this innocent and naive girl thinks the world is so beautiful and refuses to believe that it is evil despite all the evil she sees around her, and refuses to believe that a bad person who keeps sabotaging her can't be good after all. Then one day, she gets the worse hit possible from that person and then her world collapses.

Is my refusal to accept Mr Rob's definition of a lawyer similiar to that of the innocent girl's? Not saying I'm innocent, although I am. Muahahahahah. No la. Serious la please. Ahem.

I foresee a rather difficult time working with Mr Rob. Maybe I'll have to lie about him being in the office to his client or something or do something that a Christian really shouldn't do, but which a non-Christian finds perfectly alright.

Must be strong!

T_T

Ms Fong sms-ed yesterday and said that the date for the vocal exam is december 15... and that's right smack in the middle of the family camp...

Sigh...


She called today and said that Mr David of City Music said he couldn't change the date of the exam because it was set by the Trinity Board. There was an option, though. He said that perhaps we could change centres, meaning go up to Seremban or something for the exam. But then that might cause Camie and Kat to lose focus cuz they might panic or something when we get lost (yeah, I said when) looking for the centre. So Ms Fong said she would try to get the dates changed or postponed or something but she'd have to look for another accompanist in the meantime. She said she'd keep me updated on what's going on.

Bummer.

We both said so.

Bummmmmmer.

I really wanted to play... sigh... I found a bunch of people I could really share a common goal and the same fiery passion with. The MGSS choir group only wanted to win and beat NDC and CCS, the MM in church is made up of a lethargic drummer, a reluctant guitarist, and a bassist who's totally new to the bass, and MGC is almost completely lacking people who even try to sing during youth singspiration. It's not often that I find people who really want to be awesome vocalists, and I thought that I could help them gain some ground by passing this vocal exam. I guess I just wanted to be a real accompanist for once, since I could never be a licensed one.. after failing my diploma haha ~

Haiz haiz.

Well, at least God let me upgrade first. Ms Fong was finally pleased with my playing last Saturday! The bee was finally flying, the flowers were blooming, and the snow was falling like snowdrops onto the ground! My playing has finally gone up a level, and I can finally connect with the songs!

Haiz.

The bee will continue to continue flying, and the flowers will continue to bloom, and the snow will continue to fall on december 15 without me there to orchestrate them all. But at least I had a chance to do so!

Yeah!

There's always next year!!

I hope.

Hmm.

Back from OA

Geng Yi
Bryan (or Brian?)
Yi Zheng
Chen Li
Sharonne

Mark
Me
Shaun
Sin Lan

Unc Kian
A. Tina
Ju
Qi

A. Yu Ming
A. Jen
Daniel Lim
Jess

Unc Ivan
A. Kim
Marcus
Jeremy
Livia

Paul
Dan See
Sherene
Jaslyn

When we arrived at dunno what village then we changed passengers la. Cuz Mark's car too lapuk, cannot go up to the place haha. He admitted it himself k bluek. Anyway, all you need to know about the 2nd arrangement is that I had to scoot over to Auntie Yu Ming's car. This is my blog, after all. Heheh.

Hmm.

I didn't really have a memorable time this trip. Not meaning I didn't have fun and all that k. People don't go on mission trips to have fun. Reserve the fun for holidays yeah. The last time I went to OA was when I was on a GLO mission trip end of January this year, and that OA was like cacat wan la. Ahem. Meaning they have Astro, and a TV with a screen bigger than my TV screen, and all sorts of DVD's (Pirated? Hmm...), and they were totally modern. The other time was when the youth and my dad, mum, Unc Kian, and Auntie Yu Ming hiked 2 hours up to the OA settlement. Fuh ~ that one ar... can die man.

Anyway, this time, the only thing that was a bit difficult was the bamboo bridge, which was made out of, well, bamboo. I think it must be quite old already, cuz some parts of it were broken and fragile. I didn't have it too bad. Sin Lan had to carry 8kg of Milo all the way across the bridge and she said she could imagine it giving way. Maybe it was giving way. Maybe that's why I stepped onto a broken bamboo and almost fell on the way back -_-

Talking about falling, it appears to be a custom for me to fall down or spill something almost everywhere I go.

• 1st OA trip - Fell into a grass-covered hole. CK had to pull me up, and although he didn't laugh at me at the time, he's been laughing at me about it nowadays hmmph
• 3rd OA trip - Slipped on a bamboo stick and almost fell down onto the rocks. Oh pshaw, it's casual ~
• GLO: Jan 2006 - Spilled soup on Juliana, Soya bean on Bel, Milo on myself
  
• MGC - Fell down and "rolled" down the stairs to the back while hurrying to a youth committee meeting. RBS students saw everything. Cis and Tsk. More Cis than Tsk.
  
• MHS: May 2006 - Stepped into the longkang and fell down on one knee, with the whole of the other leg in the longkang. Coincidentally, it was just after the recess bell rang, and so there was A WHOLE BUNCH OF PEOPLE THERE! Aargh!
  
• MHS: October 2006 - Was walking with Ming Suan and Derrick and ter-langgar one of those broken doors on the ground and almost toppled over. Why don't they throw those things away.....................................
• Home: Every Single Day For the Past 18 Years of My Life - Rolled down the stairs almost every day when I was younger (no wonder rolling down the stairs in MGC felt familiar), spilled tea, milo, and every other drink in the house, dropped all sorts of food on the floor, broke Shaun's room stool, broke mum's washing stool, chipped off a bit of mum's crockery, accidentally pulled out a component of dad's car (still dunno what's that), ruined Ken's origami papers, and many more of such things that I don't think I want to continue talking about for some very obvious reasons.
  

Neway don't terpesong. Ok la, terpesong until very far already. Back to OA!

I didn't really mix with the OA this trip. Maybe cuz too many of us already. There were 27 of us (plus Unc David Teo, our guide), so there were little cliques here and there. The number of OA was really very little this time, and the morning worship resembled worship back home, in terms of numbers (that means not much la). Singspiration was a little messy, especially when the chairperson split us into 2 groups and asked one side (mine) to sing the stanzas, while the other group sang the chorus. Of course we didn't know how to sing la. So it was like we were guessing the song the whole way, and the fact that the other group was singing the chorus so loudly (drowning the chairperson's voice in the process) didn't help much either. After singing, Mark, Sin Lan, Shaun, Sharonne, Chen Li, Paul, Geng Yi, Brian, Yi Zheng, Auntie Yu Ming, and I headed to the other hut for the Sunday School. Mark was in charge; Sin Lan, Shaun and Sharonne were helping him, and I invited myself, as Mark said. The rest ar? Chen Li mmg like Children's Ministry wan, and since Yi Zheng and Brian are her friends, they tagged along lor. Geng Yi and Auntie Yu Ming go wherever children go, and Paul, well, Paul was just playing with the monkey. Hmm. Let's not talk much about that.

I felt a little odd cuz so many people went this time. Every since the new oversight took over, I've been having this really funny feeling. Youth events have been on the decline, and in my mind, I keep attributing it to the fact that the oversight have been so ghairah in having events and activities that the youth has been deprived of our own evangelistic ministry. Haiz. I wrote a lot about this just now, but decided to scrape it. It might stumble some people ^^; So I'll leave it at that. Maybe I need some time to get used to the new oversight first. Sigh.

This trip had me witnessing some odd behaviour on the part of the adults, but also helped me see the good side of Unc Kian. He's always extra helpful on trips like these. He helped me the 1st OA trip also, and at Lendu, when I was literally coughing my life away. Hmm. If only he'll be just as nice every other day, I think I just might be able to really warm up to him. Hmm. As I told Chen Li, "hmm" is my standard expression, so you can start getting tired of seeing it now cuz you'll see it many more times. Watching the adults has helped me grow more determined to educate my children properly in the future, and to discipline them with the good ol' rotan, no matter how much it hurts me. It'll hurt them more than it'll hurt me anyway haha ~ Hmm! (like dunno what speech-less anime character liddat) I also didn't correct some of the youth (some adults also) when they were doing something wrong and indecent. I should have, and I really regret not doing so back then. I thought that it would be awful to correct them in front of non-Christians, but looking back, it's really worse testimony not to correct them there and then.

This trip also helped me see that there're a lot of changes that need to take place in me before I can really ask God to use me. I didn't really talk to the OA, and I feel bad about it. I only talked to two girls while they were cooking fried rice, and played some tickling game with the kids. Other than that, my "contributions" to this trip has made me feel useless, and I sort of wonder why I went this time anyway. It was like going for holiday, and that's plain wrong. There are so many people who genuinely need help from us people from the world outside the jungle, and here I am going for a holiday??? I didn't intend for it to be a holiday, but my uselessness made it a holiday anyway. Sigh. Unless I know for sure that my presence there will make a difference, and unless I promise myself and God to do something beneficial there, I will not attend the next OA trip!


Oh ya. We (Mark's kaki-kereta) got lost on the way to Tapah, and on the way back from Tapah. Horrendous. Will blog about it next time. Today I must finish my Math S probability revision excercise. Due tomorrow!