Hmmph. A few minutes ago, as I sat here with the computer before me, and the empty post section staring me in the face, I finally admitted that I had absolutely nothing to write.
Is it because nothing's happening in my life? Nah.. many things are happening everyday.
The problem is: I don't know which event to pen down (or errr keyboard down -_-).
Why exactly do people blog? I mean, I can understand displaying your personal opinions about general and public events, but why display private stuff ONLINE where EVERYONE can see it and then deny you're feeling that way when people ask you about it, and go through the hassle of having to cover it up? Why a blog when a diary (where almost no one can intrude except occasional intrusions by siblings) is a much better means of expressing and concealing thoughts that you usually do not want others to peek into?
For instance, if I have feelings for this certain guy, and if the people who have access to my blog include people who know this guy also, won't it be a little awkward if I displayed my feelings for him in my blog? Even if the people who read my blog are not direct acquaintances, it would still be odd. Like so pathetic and desperate liddat.
Sumore cannot criticize people online =_=
Chen Li's blog is usually about every single thing that happens between her and her friends, namely juliana, yen mei, and a few others whom I don't know. Occasionally she includes events that happen in MGC, meaning there are people like Daniel, Z, and even Ken involved. What I feel is this: I am from MGC also. I've only seen my name in her blog twice or so. And that also as a kelefair (is it spelled like that?) only. Meaning, I'm mentioned as a passing breeze only. For instance, the Family Sports Day 2006. She was relating how she got soaked by a few people. And she couldn't remember the last person who splashed her with water. She made a couple of wild guesses (none of whom was me). In actual fact, I was that last person. Imagine how I felt yeah. I keep feeling like I'm not important, like I'm not significant.
In her GLO entries, her experiences mostly revolved around Shuang and Hooi Siang etc. Our MGC girls experiences... a little bit only. Most people won't understand how I can get so fussed up about such little things. Well, the fact is, I'm not a good conversationalist and a really bad socializer. When I get to fit into a group, it really makes me feel happy. In GLO, I really thought I could finally do that, you know, fit in or something. But then I'm like just a supporting role in Chen Li's story. Maybe not even a supporting role. At least they appear in every episode. I'm more like the water boy (or girl) for the movie set or something.
It's not her fault. She has the right to write whatever she wants. What I'm saying is that by using this style for blogging, there IS the possibility that I might hurt someone out there without realizing it.
So how exactly should I blog? I won't claim this blog to be mine and only mine, because the fact is that by making this blog public in the first place, I'm declaring that it is free for all to read. So my private thoughts can't exactly be expressed freely anymore. Those who keep diaries should get my drift. When I write in my diary, it's really for me. No one else should be reading it. Blogging is different. I need to blog in such a way that the readers can relate to.
After all, blog is just short for weblog. LOG. When we say 'the captain's log', it refers to a nautical record of the ship's voyage. It's for people to read, you see. The captain includes some nautical terms, of course, but he doesn't fill it with terminology that is incomprehensible to the readers.
After contemplating so much, I'm still stuck in Square 1.
Haiz. Being the lazy person I am, I'll probably take the laziest and easiest route.
Don't tell anyone about this blog.
Har-har.
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