running on adrenaline.

It's that time of the year again. That time of the year when I walk around looking really tired but still somehow manage to get things done, because I'm running on adrenaline.

D. E. Hoste, Hudson Taylor's successor once asked Hudson how he could overcome the wandering mind during prayer. Among other things, Hudson told him to allow his body enough rest. 

This also reminded me of something Melissa (Chin) said about a doctor who worked long hours - 

"You can't run on adrenaline, because then you make mistakes."

If anyone asked me what I learned most in my term as President, I think it would surprise some people that I wouldn't talk about how I learned to organize people and things, how I learned patience, how I learned that people are not robots that can easily be told to do this or that.

I did learn all of that, in greater measures than I ever imagined or maybe... wanted. Haha. (Now that I've learned them, I want them la. Haha.)

Above all, I learned to ask for help.

People like to call me a superwoman, but I'm not. 

I'm really not. 

I know the difference between working with passion, and working on adrenaline. 

And today, my body tells me that I am slightly overworked. 

I'm still working on asking for help, because the natural thing to do seems to be to do everything myself when things get messy. 

I'm learning to help other people help me. 

Sometimes that takes more work than doing things myself, but then... was it ever just about work?

It came as a sort of surprise today that I was able to tell Evelyn (paraphrased):

It's not my work, it's His.

So, Father - it's Your responsibility.

You carry it out.

I'll work with what You give me.

The greatest line from church today, which I think baffles the world:

The fruit of the Spirit is

love, joy, peace,

patience, kindness, goodness,

faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Self-control helps you say that it is ok not to be in control.

Because God is in control.

Doing the Lord's work doesn't mean I become a superhuman.

It just means there will be strength from above. 

In the meantime, the weak body shall rest to refresh the willing spirit.

Father, 

Your will be done. 

On earth, 

as it is in heaven.

Amen.