When I was a secondary school student, my English teacher asked me to answer a question from the textbook.
I did.
My answer was correct.
But she suddenly went on a tirade, saying that my answer was wrong, lecturing me in front of everyone and saying that I was always proud.
It was a really long tirade.
Thankfully, for the health of my soul, I only remember the part where she said I was always proud. But I remember the gist of her lecture, which was that I was too proud and therefore made the very mistake I didn't think I would ever make.
I also remember what I felt was the purpose of her lecture, which I suppose was to "put me in my place" for being proud. And apparently, the only way to effectively humble me was to do it in public. Because nothing breeds humility more than public humiliation.
I also remember what I felt at that point (ok, not really at that point, because I used to be a blur sotong and sarcasm and its brothers would usually fly over my head at the material point of time and only come back to haunt me later in the day as I thought a little more about it) - the feeling of being wronged, wrongfully accused and betrayed.
After her tirade, she moved on to ask the next person to answer the next question, then realized that my answer had been correct after all - she had actually read the wrong question.
So I was - supposedly - vindicated.
A friend behind me blurted out, "Teacher, you wrongly accused her."
The teacher ignored her and went on to the next question.
I think that incident has stayed with me for a long time, partly because I'm a words person, and words that deeply hurt me are difficult to forget. I remember them and more crucially, the host of feelings that come with those words as if they were spoken yesterday.
Recounting this incident because of something which recently happened and triggered this memory.
I suppose this would most definitely count as something to deal with in counseling class.
Also, teachers, parents, leaders, friends, colleagues - be careful what you say to other people. Your words may have a greater impact than you think.
Applicable to self also.
Let there be less pride and prejudice,
and more humility and grace.
